The meddling mother

Mum: So I have to take some things to your brother tomorrow, and I was wondering whether you wanted to go for a bite to eat after work

Me: Sure

Mum: Is there somewhere nearby we could eat? (note: I work smack bang in the centre of town, there are about 20 restaurants in a one-block radius)

Me: How about Portofino? We can look at the hot Italian waiters!

Mum: Good idea! I can ask one of them to marry you!

Me: Brilliant! He could get residency!